The Mistress

the rain is heavy outside
killing every last hope of sunshine
and here i lie naked
my dignity once again was raped
my dreams for the nth time shattered
no arms to hold me and embrace

how long will i endure the pain
for a love that will never last forever
how will i keep myself believing
that he is mine forever
how much more do i have to give
to receive what i deserve

i have to keep lying to myself each day
that someday the future will be brighter
that one day i’ll wake up with him beside me
pampering me with morning kisses
and loving me endlessly

for now
i have to take everything he can give
bite every bitterness that my heart can receive

i understand
my choice will pro-long my misery
because after every nights of love tales and dreams
i know i will still be waking up alone

i just know
because he’s got a family and a place he call his home

~ by Asian Butterfly on September 29, 2009.

7 Responses to “The Mistress”

  1. Cried when I read this – I know what this feels like.

    I’m sorry that you do.


    • oh, i wonder what it feels like, i did love a man who was in love with another woman, but never a committed one…
      what can we do, love sometimes control us…

      i hope you are well now.

      hugs for you

  2. so vulnerable, beautiful, disheartening… you deserve more.

  3. oh, it was hard for me to write this poem, knowing it wasn’t my experience, my muse was a woman who called on a radio program, who fell deeply in love with a married man. glad you liked it Jaymie.

  4. I wrote one for a close friend who had been molested by her father. Because she could not write it herself. It’s a completely unbelieveable experience. Suspension of disbielf. *applause*

  5. this is very well conveyed- can we exchange links?

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